As a single person, you can go home, strip to your underwear, and dance your Friday blues away; Liberties you may not enjoy in a relationship.
Supposedly, relationships are meant to be a happy, peaceful, and safe space. Whenever you are in chaos, or your parents gave you hell for not being a responsible adult, you run to your love because they make things better. The two of you are so deep into each other, that nothing about the other person phases you. All is well, but honestly speaking how safe is your relationship?
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Because frankly speaking, there are things that still cannot be exposed to your significant other because there is no need to overindulge. Sometimes, when you do, trust that there will be a silent judging eye in your wake and best believe it is coming from that person who claims they love all your sides, good and bad.
- Your kinks
Every so often during ‘sheet time’, you try hard to prove that you have some tricks up your sleeve. So, you come up with tips or fold each other in poses that could get rid of grief. In the back of your mind, you are thinking ‘she will be ecstatic after I’m done with her’. To your shock, she crushes your hope by asking where the hell you learned such sorcery. Too bad for you, because she will surely keep judging you, yet here you were thinking that ‘itaeleweka’. Is this a safe space or not Jenny?
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- Your dressing
Usually, if you are the type not to care for dress code, your partner will try to get you back in shape. I will not have you embarrass me, James. However, you may try to be a little free and give them the liberty to dress however they like. Internally though, you are screaming so loud you can barely see. We judge our partners based on how they dress. Even when they look good, sometimes we never get past a ‘slip-up’. That is why your husband asks you why you insist on wearing a bodycon with that big bag of baby fat on your tummy. Ironically, just the other day he complimented you on how your body still glows after five kids.
- Food portions
‘I like a girl who can eat’ and other short stories. Sister, do not be lied to. They are judging you for filling your plate with a mountain too big to see the other side. There’re always thoughts of ‘is she going to finish? She will get fat after this, or the bill will read Ksh 5,000 at this rate.
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- Your ‘stinkies’
This has got to be the best one yet. Once you move in together and they realize that your doodoo stinks enough to suffocate you, it is over. He will smile with you obviously, but when you go number two, trust that he will have an air freshener in hand to scare the ‘demons’ away.
Yeah, that’s relationships’ safe space for you.
