Whoever told people, especially Kenyans that you can only expect to be given in relationships lied. The truth of the matter is, you get what you give.
“I like you, but what do you bring to the table?” This question has gotten many people who have a mutual attraction for each other to go their separate ways. For some reason, many have found it rather offensive. I mean, how dare he ask that? ‘Baby, I am the table.’ When perhaps it can be a little over the stretch, such questions need to be asked before you even think about getting into serious relationships with people.
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The thing is, we get into relationships expecting a lot of things, both on the physical, emotional, and financial levels. When Jenny says yes after you pop the ‘will you be my girlfriend’ question, she comes in all giddy smelling like cocoa butter and expectations. Sadly, if you do not meet them, she bounces. No time to waste with a stingy man when she can always find generosity in the streets.
However, we need to understand that relationships are transactional. There is no shortcut for it. You expect love, you give love in return. You want gifts, gift back as well. If you want honesty, try it sometime yourself. We get what we give. Being in a relationship is like being in a business. If you do not put in the capital, your business is going nowhere. No expenses incurred equals no return on investment.
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When there is nothing wrong with wanting your partner to do nice things for you, you must be willing to reciprocate. Do not let pride swell your head at the expense of happiness.
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Bottom line is, you have to put in the work for your relationship to thrive. That includes doing nice things for each other, instead of always expecting them without extending a hand yourself.
If anything is to go by, you might stay in a relationship being a leech and when your partner has had enough, they will go seek consolation elsewhere. Here’s the catch; people are good with offering comfort; everyone knows comfort spreads to other body parts.
